Ok drivers, we’re looking at about 5 months away now from Christmas. Let’s not let these hard times get in the way of planning a wonderful holiday season. Even taking an empty coffee can and filling it up with your loose change, could make a big difference in buying nice presents. Start using cash more than your credit or debit card and the can will fill up faster than you think. You have 5 months to accumulate a nice stash of cash.
Santa, see the photo, is taking some time off right now. He’s with his grandkids in Florida. Do any of you remember a place called Cypress Gardens in Winter Haven FL? It went out of business a few years ago, but the property was purchased by Lego. Yes, the multi-colored plastic snap together thingy’s. They’re building Lego-land. Santa was hoping it would be open before he had to head back up North to see how the elves were doing. Despite his worldwide following – he now has 50 BILLION Facebook followers! – our jolly deliverer of holiday cheer, mirth and merry is going to have trouble getting enough coinage for the $75 per person admission. There will be truck parking though.
QVC, the home shopping network, just had a big Christmas in July sale. The month is over, but they always have great deal on all kinds of things like laptops, camera, phones and jewelry. A lot of it can be paid for on 3,4 or 6 “easy” payments. You can use a debit card. My last three computers were purchased that way. HSN has similar deals. K-Mart, if you can find one, is reminding folks that they still have layaway and with school back in session soon, there will be lots of sales. In Florida, there is a tax amnesty for items bought for school. You can buy now and store stuff in the garage until the holiday. Check if you State offers the same.
Santa, like the rest of us, has had his share of problems recently. I’ve written about it on Life On The Road before. Santa, again, see photo, can barely peddle that bike. Thousands of years of being cramped in the sleigh, the hours and hours of flying around the world delivering presents to girls and boys without a break – we all know about the closure of rest areas due to budget cuts – and all that chimney climbing has taken its toll on Santa’s knees. He is taking medication for his high blood pressure and diabetes, but has given up going to that clinic in Alaska for his official DOT physical. Much of Santa’s inventory now comes from China. His elves have gone from making stuff to unloading ocean containers.
For the first time in centuries, Santa has had to lay off elves and – sadly – two of his reindeer. With the post office closing so many locations and Santa not being able to figure out how to use his new iPad Mrs. Claus got him, communicating what boys and girls want for Christmas has become more and more difficult. Hackers against Christmas – HAC – have crashed the North Pole servers getting the main wish list all screwed up. Boys could get dolls and girls might receive footballs – quite a mess. Along with the whole global warming thing, things are not as joyous as they used to be with Kris Cringle.
But, you can help out. Don’t wait, buy now. I know in some places it’s like 150 degrees. Don’t let that stand in your way of remembering that the weather changes quickly on planet earth and time passes in the blink of an eye. Poof and it’ll be Thanksgiving and then boom, Christmas. Plan ahead, be proactive. Forget all this budget crisis nonsense and shop, shop, shop. Let me be the first to say to you all, MERRY CHRISTMAS!
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